moms extraordinaire
"Every working mom needs a little me time!"
I was recently perusing the aisles of Victoria's Secrets on a ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Unearthing Your Sensual Man For those of us women who have discovered the power and pleasure of living sensuously, trying to enroll our families, particularly our men, into the lifestyle can be a challenge. Most of us would argue that the men in our lives, while great, are not necessarily the sensitive, let-me-stop-and-sniff-the-flowers types. But not so fast. It is amazing how often we are wrong about what men do and don’t like. And while it’s true you may not get him to walk with you and be awed to tears by the natural beauty that surrounds him, don’t think for a moment that men, no matter how macho, don’t appreciate the experience of living sensually. I emphasize the word ‘experience’ because conceptually, sensuality is not on the conscious radar of the vast majority of men. But you’d be hard pressed to find one that won’t enjoy it when he’s in the midst of your sensual world. 1. Turn your environment into a sensual wonderland. If you can’t work on your entire home, start with your bedroom and make it an oasis for relaxation, pleasure and passion. Your makeover can be as simple or as elaborate as you can afford, but even with only a few changes, you can make it a space where your man and his senses are tantalized and seduced. Keep four out of your five senses in mind (taste in this instance has only to do with style, but make sure that his tastes are included.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What working mother out there hasn’t muttered the words, “I’m too tired to feel sexy or I’m too
So just how does one accomplish the gigantic feat of getting their sexy back?
--------------------------------------------
Here are a few of my favorite sexy things: Kindness is sexy. Laughter is sexy. Humor is sexy. Bold is sexy. Truth is sexy. Confidence is sexy. Compassion is sexy. Mystery is sexy. Fairness is sexy. Loving God is sexy. Loving yourself is sexy. Sexy is as sexy does at any age or weight!
Most of all sexy is an attitude. It’s not found in a coquettish laugh or a particular cup-size. Sexy is an outward expression of your feminine confidence. Think back to the last time you felt sexy. Didn’t you stand taller, walk that ‘come hither’ strut and wear a twinkle in your eye that left the world wondering, “What’s up with her?” Being sexy is about becoming visible to yourself as well as others.
So release your sexy attitude for no other reason than because that’s who you are. This is not about trying to attract anyone or even to pump yourself up to have sex. Recognize that you are the new sexy and live like you mean it.
Here are some ways to get started.
Dress sexy today and every day. Don’t wait for date night to look like the sensual woman you are because that’s about putting on a costume not being you. Dressing sexy is NOT about revealing and inappropriate clothing that draws attention for all the wrong reasons. Dressing sexy IS about wearing clothes (in fabrics that feel good against your skin) and sensual signatures that make you feel good about being you. Clothes that highlight and enhance your most attractive features. Dressing sexy is about your sexy scent, hair that’s been coiffed and appealing hands and feet. Bottomline: Dressing sexy is about CARING about your appearance and making an effort to look good and feel good for YOURSELF.
Give Your Terrible Too’s a Time Out. Sexy attitudes often get waylaid by negative thoughts. Make a list of your terrible too’s (I’m too…this, I’m too that.) On the flip side, make a list of all your other attributes that offset the terrible too’s. Now each time a terrible too rears its ugly head, say this to yourself…
“I may be too___but I’m still way too sexy for me or anyone else who matters to care.”
Stay tuned for "Bringing Sexy Back - Part II in January!
Check out www.weapons-of-mass-seduction.blogspot.com for more tips on unleashing the sensual you.
Raising A Sensual Son
buying trip for my daughter. So there I was in the PINK section
(read teen VS), trying to find age-appropriate draws (not too sexy
but not too childish) for my soon-to-be sweet sixteen girl and
trying to figure out exactly at what point low-rise actually became
synonymous with band-aid, when a woman walked through the front door with her son. The mom looked to be in her late 30's and her son, I'd say somewhere between 10 and 12. Hand-in-hand they stepped past the hoodies and sweats; boy shorts, bikinis and thongs adorned with hearts and puppies, and just as they are about to cross the threshold into grown and sexy land, the woman yanked him back and said,
"Close your eyes, there are women's unmentionables in here." She then proceeded to pull this poor boy through the store and up to the cashier's desk to take care of her return.
Okay, so you know I stood there clutching a handful of cotton with that crazy "you're kidding me, right?" look sprayed across my face. I mean we weren't in a sex shop or at a nude fashion show or even the VS Angels runway show for that matter. We were in underwear store--albeit one that caters to those who adore the feel of satin and lace on their skin--but an underwear store nonetheless. I watched as this (IMHO) sad and ridiculous example of the blind leading the blind, and thought, Well there's another one some future woman is going to have to train.
Instead of making her son close his eyes like he was at some kind or dirty little peep show, she should have let him take in the wonderment of ladies lingerie and grabbed this as an opportunity to teach him how to appropriately admire ladies and their sensual ways, beginning with the idea that his mama is a woman. I recognize that these kind of talks can be tough, but I have always found that it's the matter-of-fact, age appropriate message that makes it so much easier to speak about and listen to.
As I stood there, in my mind, I relived a past conversation.
"What are you laughing at?"
"There's no butt in those underwear."
"Well, I guess they do look a little funny, but they have a purpose. When ladies where them under their pants or skirts you don't see the lines of their panties."
"What are those?"
"Garter belts. Some women use them to hold up their stockings instead of wearing pantyhose."
"I'm glad boys don't have to wear that kind of stuff."
"Well, boys don't have breasts so they don't need bras and they wear different kinds of pants so they don't need the same kind of undergarments. Besides I like wearing them."
"Why?"
"Because they make me feel pretty and special."
I pretty much had this exact conversation with my son, who is now nearly 20. Over the years we've had a multitude of conversations ranging from don't diss the third grade girls who like you but you don't like (she is braver than you because she had the courage to tell you how she felt and risk being rejected. You're fortunate that someone likes you that way. Be nice and kind)to oral sex (Oral sex is SEX and all sex is mutual and respectful so don't expect any woman to do for you what you won't do for her)to girls who cry (there is a difference between a girl who cries to manipulate you and one who is genuinely distressed. Recognize the difference, treat both gently but understand that Miss Drama is Her Middle Name, is going to be more trouble in the long run).
Talking is always good, and the mother-to-son conversation is especially important. Ladies, it's our jobs as mothers to counter the asinine and inappropriate media messages our sons receive and teach them to respect and admire women, even in their underwear. We have to help them understand body image and that the airbrushed bodies they covet in those videos and magazines aren't the bodies of most real women and even if they do start out that way, age, childbirth, hormones etc. will alter that temporary perfection. They need to understand the difference between sexy women and tempting tramps and to respect themselves enough to walk away from what may be readily available but potentially troublesome. You need to show by example that smart and confident is the kind of sexy that is true and lasting.
Come on moms, help an up-and-coming sister out. Teach your sons to be a respectful, responsible, tender, appreciative husband and lover for the lucky girl out there who will eventually be his.
What do you think? 
In other words, in order to unearth your sensual man, you may first have to bring the pleasure of sensuous living to him and not be concerned that initially he may not even realize what’s happening. But believe me, before long most of you will see little changes taking place that indicate his transformation.
As pointed out previously, living through your five senses is all about pleasure. Here are a few ideas to help you enroll your family into your sensual world.
2. Savor mealtime. At least once a week, treat yourself and your mate to some sensual dining. Make your meals scrumptious by incorporating assorted textures and tastes, and serve them in a visually pleasing manner. Candles, flowers, and table linens go a long way in helping to make meals more a true dining experience. Take the time to taste and enjoy every bite as you savor your meal and the company of your loved ones. And when possible, include him in the cooking process. Don't just make him your sous chef for the sake of the extra kitchen help--taste and tantalize while cooking up the idea of 'dessert' while you're working--if you know what I mean!
3. Be in the moment and draw him into it with you. As you witness and savor the sensual world around you, share your discoveries and delights with your husband. Happiness and gratitude are contagious. Let him see the new enthusiasm for the beauty of life as you find it and before you know it, he’ll be noticing a few things on his own.
What do you think?
-----------------------------------------------------------------
What's Your Passion?
In my travels, I hear a lot of women (and men) complain about a lack of passion in the bedroom. This lack is often blamed on a multitude of things—exhaustion, overloaded schedule, kids, boredom, no time, no energy, no interest. All legit reasons in some ways, all bogus excuses in others.
There are an awful lot of women out there who aren't passionate about anything let alone sex. Women who believe that passion is something lived only through their sex lives. They have very little passion about things outside the bedroom and then have trouble turning it on inside.
Think about it. Have you ever asked yourself, "What am I truly passionate about?" I bet that most of you can't identify a true passion in your life beyond your children, and that can be a stretch on some days.
We tend to think of passion in the same erroneous way we think of sensuality--as some obscure emotion that we pull out of our sexual trick bag and turn on for the delight of our partner. And it's true, one definition of passion is strong sexual desire and excitement. But true passion is about having a sincere zest for life. It's about finding wonder and excitement in all aspects of living, not just in the bedroom.
Passion is not something someone bestows on you or turns on within you. If it's there, they can turn in up but you're the only one who can actually turn it on. And you can fake it for sure, but what fun is that? Why live with fraudulent passion when you can have the awe-inspiring real thing?
Live with passion in all areas of your life and you'll find that between the sheets, it becomes a natural extension of who you truly are--not someone you're trying to be. Learn to live with passion and you'll soon learn that you were never lacking sexual prowess, but rather were low on interest and curiosity in ALL areas of your life.
Living life through your senses is a natural gateway to living with full-on passion. As I've stated many times, when you live with the joyous preoccupation of the wonders all around you, you can't help but become more loving, grateful, appreciative, joyous and yes, passionate. Finding delight in your true nature and taking interest and care of yourself and your appearance will make you feel more confident and interesting, which also ups the big "P" factor.
Get into life. Find joy where you stand. And just watch how much more passionate you become.
Check out more at www.weapons-of-mass-seduction.blogspot.com
Bringing Sexy Back Part II
Sex on the Brain
out of shapet to feel sexy.”
If you really want to bring sexy back and amp up your romantic life, it’s time to wake up your sexy mind, because where your mind goes, your butt follows.
Thinking sexy when you're in a new relationship is easy. Mother Nature kicks your body into overdrive to create a potent mix that attracts you to and bonds you with your new lover. More powerful than an Appletini, this hormonal cocktail is what makes you feel deliciously off balance, heady, giddy and hot, hot, hot!
But what Mother Nature giveth, she also taketh away. One day you wake up and realize that those habits you once thought of as endearing are now irritating. Suddenly he’s not so perfect and the sex god he once was has turned into an insensitive slob. Combine that with the stress and rush of kids, work and the details of day-to-day life, and before you know it, sex has become something you do, not something you want. You’ve unwittingly slipped into a state of sexual neutrality—you’re not necessarily in the mood for sex, but you can get there if you have/need/want to.
This can be a critical point for a lot of women. When buzz of new romance wears off and familiarity sets in, you shut down thinking about yourself as a sensual, sexual being. Stilettos are traded in for sneakers, sensible undies replace lingerie, and all the things that once made up your natural seduction kit are relegated to props for designated romantic celebrations.
And this is exactly why keeping sex on the brain is so important to every working mom’s sexual vitality. Like those Jimmy Choos you can’t get off your mind—the more you think about something, the more you HAVE to have it. Sex is no different.
Try these three tips for reinvigorating your sexy mind.
1. Keep thinking sexy thoughts. Fantasizing about Lamman Rucker or Denzel is not a bad thing. The joy of a pleasurable ‘mind job” is that you don’t have to be responsible, reasonable or safe for that matter. Let your mind be a sexy playground where you can fulfill every side of your sexual self—even the freaky side which will probably never see the light of day but can be some serious fuel to keep that lusty fire burning.
2. Stay away from negative thoughts about sex. Parents, pastors, and past experiences may have helped form your opinions about sex, and truth be told, they may not be YOUR opinions. Negative ideas, those that seem to fight with your authentic sexual desires, need to be looked at and challenged on the regular. Reprogram your brain to understand that your feminine confidence (i.e. sexual confidence), vitality and fulfillment are CRUCIAL to your existence as a fully alive, fully realized woman. And because your sexual turn-ons are as individual as your fingerprints, what entity has the right to judge your desires?
3. Think like a man. Ask yourself: Why do guys want to have sex all the time? And we all know the answer to that question: Because they think about it all the time. For example, a man will use an elevator ride as an opportunity for some erotic sight-seeing. He spots a great butt and immediately fantasizes about giving it a firm squeeze. A woman spots a nice tush, sneaks a quick glance and then goes back to her to-do list for the day. Let the visuals around you spice up your thoughts for later.
Wake up that sexy mind and get to know your inner sexiness. Stop being so consumed with the condition of your bodies, you are neglecting the biggest turn-on of all.
Check out www.weapons-of-mass-seduction.blogspot.com for more tips on unleashing the sensual you.
BRINGING SEXY BACK - PART I
What is sexy?
To be sexy is the secret wish of the majority of working moms everywhere. But have you ever really defined this word, look, attitude for yourself? I mean, how can you bring sexy back when you haven’t truly defined for yourself what sexy is?
Do the Clark Kent. Make what’s under there, inspirational underwear. You can learn a lot from a superhero. No matter what he was wearing on top, underneath